Sometimes

...there are thoughts that creep into my mind, 

minor and almost irrelevant.

Things of the past.

The what ifs...?

I ignore them, for a while...then after that, 

the thoughts come back.

Still irrelevant, but nagging.

Whatever happened to the people of the past?

Are they still the same? 

Are they in a different city/state/country/married/kids/famous?

Are they happy?

This last thought makes me wonder if I'm truly happy.

I am blessed with a good life, great family and an amazing husband.

But then, I know when the nagging thoughts get louder in my head.

After contemplating for years...

I now realize there is a definite pattern! 

A crazy pattern exists to when my nostalgia for the past is overpowering.

Exactly during the times of strained focus - 

which is the pinnacle of stress - 

on the Kaplan publications,

when I'm engrossed in reviewing the intricacies of the components

of platelets' alpha granules and dense bodies,

or some other such detailed, intellectually challenging task,

my mind fights back with wanting to wander off,

yes, to a less difficult matter...

Yet,

the past is better as just that.

Moving in the same direction as time is in my best interest.

Or, 

maybe, 

this is what I say when it's harder to find people of the past online.

;)